


Once I had A Dream

by Nadja_Lee



Category: Alexander (2004)
Genre: Afterlife, Bittersweet Ending, Cute, Fluff, M/M, Sappy, Short & Sweet, True Love, eternal love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-03-04
Updated: 2006-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:00:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23017417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nadja_Lee/pseuds/Nadja_Lee
Summary: Alexander thinks his dream have come true[Printed in the 2006 Alexander zine "You Strike Me Still"]
Relationships: Alexandros III of Macedon | Alexander the Great/Hephaistion of Macedon
Kudos: 41





	Once I had A Dream

I can see them now. Standing at my balcony in Babylon, watching the streets below me. I see them now. People of all races, from all across my empire. Here before me. To learn, to teach, to unite. This was the dream I carried with me through the years; to experience this moment.

I smile to myself. Everything seems perfect; only one thing is missing. I turn and look for him; where is he, my Hephaistion? This is also his dream for he too is Alexander; we are one. He stood by me through it all, never once did he leave me. I was never blind to the scorn he had to live through; the envy of the court. Yet my beautiful Patroclus never once complained, never once bowed his head. He stood proudly at my side, never once demanding, never once complaining that he had to share my affections.

##  _No one will ever love you as much as I do_

He had once spoken those words to me and now I smile. I never doubted it. When my beloved still doesn’t join me I frown. Where is he? He is always here when I need him; he would never leave me.

##  _I worry for you without me_

His voice, his words, so filled with love yet also a pain so clear it cuts my heart. Why would he say those words? I try to remember but a grief so strong it threatens to force me to my knees slam into me and I shake my head, refusing the memory entrance. No, my Phai would never speak those words for there would be no need to. He would be forever with me for I know…without him I would not wish to live. I would be unable to. We are one after all.

I turn from the beautiful scene below me to gaze into my bedchamber. Everything is like the first time Hephaistion came to me. Even the bath Begoas had prepared for me stands ready in the corner. I smile, remembering how I talked Hephaistion into bathing with me that evening after we had talked on the balcony. How I had washed his long black hair. So soft to the touch…why do I feel such sorrow, such bittersweetness at this thought? As if I have not touched him for a very long time. 

“This is the world you dreamt, my Achilles,” my most beloved whispers to me, his words like music in my ears. He sounds so close as if he stands just behind me. I turn with a smile, feeling joy and relief wash over me. Yet when I turn I see only the night; he is not there.

“Phaistion?” I question, worried. Ever since first meeting him only Hephaistion has ever been able to grant me a moment of peace, a feeling of security. In my heart there has never been anyone but him.

“I remain with you, always,” he says softly, his voice like a ghostly caress but when I turn around to try and spot him he is not there. I feel cold now; alone and lost.

“Stay with me tonight,” I whisper, need, love and longing in my voice. So often I have spoken those words to him and never once have he denied me, never once have he made a demand in return. Sometimes I believe my mother’s words that I am the son of Zeus are true for surely only a child of a God could be granted such joy by Aphrodite that I have found in Hephaistion.

“I always will.” The love in his voice, the faith he shows in me…I close my eyes to enjoy this moment, to fall into his words as I would his embrace. When I reopen my eyes I am looking out at the joyous people on the street below…my dream fulfilled, my desire for conquest, for knowledge, to keep moving, finally at rest.

“Did you ever believe in my dream?” I ask my elusive lover, somehow feeling he is close. I can feel his body heat grow beside me as if he is about to appear right beside me. I wonder what he is waiting for but I shall give him time. That is the least I can do.

“I did not believe it could be reached but I believed it was right. Yet I believed in you and in your abilities. I always did and I always will.”

His voice is close now, as if he is standing right beside me. I wait, refusing to look at where his voice came from, afraid to find empty air again. His body heat is there beside me now, strong and safe and warm. His breath reaches my ear. Hoping, praying, longing, I turn to the side, towards his voice…and he is there. Just like that first night, dressed in a long dark robe, his hair loose and the scars from the battle still clear in his face. He is breathtaking and when he smiles softly at me, his eyes sparkling with love, he takes my life with him.

“My Hephaistion,” I get out and embrace him, holding him so tight I fear I might bruise him yet he doesn’t complain but simply melts into my embrace, holding me close.

“Always,” he whispers into my hair and I have to fight to keep tears at bay. Finally, after a lifetime, I draw back and release my hold on him.

“By the Gods, I feel like it has been forever since last I saw your face,” I say heartfelt and cups his face with my hands. He smiles warmly, softly, and places his hands above mine.

“It has been a long time,” he admits, tears glimmering in his eyes. “I am saddened I did not come to you sooner but I could not.”

Something in his voice…something about all this fills me with melancholy. I plant a soft kiss to his lips, enjoying the taste and feel of him and my tongue enters his mouth to taste, claim and assure myself he is truly here and he is mine. He willingly leans into the touch and deepens the kiss with an intensity and desperation that fuels my suspicions. Reluctantly I draw back and our hands fall apart as we simply look at each other. I drink him in, letting the sight of him fill my every senses and in that moment I know.

“This is a dream, is it not?” I ask softly, the question not really a question. There is a pain out there somewhere, a grief so profound its agony is physical. I do not wish to return there.

He smiles softly, a bit sadly. “Yes, my Alexander.”

“I wish we could stay here and never awake,” I admit, not understanding why my cheeks are wet. We are only dreaming, walking in the land of Morpheus. We are simply dreaming.

“We can,” he says, a loving and soft tone to his voice as he strokes my cheek.

“Truly?” I ask eagerly. I know there will be conflicts back there, decisions, danger to my Hephaistion…pain. I like this place better.

“Yes. Our bodies now rest forever. Our spirits can soar here, together. Forever,” he says heartfelt, his eyes shining with love and devotion. What did I ever do to deserve a love as pure as this one? Yet whatever it was I did I am forever grateful for it.

“Forever,” I agree happily. There are no pain here, no grief, no demands. I do not grieve the life I leave behind; somehow I know I have been miserable for a long time. I was alone there; I remember that now. Here I am with Hephaistion, the only person who I have ever trusted completely, the only one I have ever given my heart. I have nothing to grieve and as Hephaistion closes in to kiss my lips I smile happily.

“Forever safe in your love. I could never ask for more,” I say softly against his lips and I know it is true. In this world my goals have been reached and he remains my only dream, my only love.

“Forever with you, by your side, my Alexander,” he mumbles before our lips meet and there is no need for more words.

Once I had a dream…now I am living it. Forever safe; forever sleeping in my beloved’s embrace in the afterlife.


End file.
